


Pretend to be Human

by Daegaer



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: AU, Androids, Friendship, M/M, Partial Mind Control, Science Fiction, Travel, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-31
Updated: 2015-12-31
Packaged: 2018-05-10 17:55:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,683
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5595460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daegaer/pseuds/Daegaer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In an out-of-the-way hotel, all the guests seem to have fallen ill. Then things really go wrong. Sanzo's android servants, Hakkai and Gojyo, attempt to find out what's happening.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pretend to be Human

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Saiyuki New Year Gift Exchange.
> 
> For Niclai.
> 
> Many thanks to Puddingcat for beta-reading!

Sanzo looked more tired than ever, which meant he was in a worse mood than usual, and was more than ready to take it out on the nearest targets.

"Don't eat with your damn mouth open," he snapped at Goku. "It's disgusting."

"Sorry, Sanzo," Goku said. "Would you like the last dumpling? They're really good –" 

"I don't want the damn dumpling," Sanzo said, and lit up, right at the dinner table.

Gojyo could feel Hakkai stiffen the barest fraction of a millimeter. It wasn't good manners to smoke and eat at the same time, Hakkai said. It wasn't anything Gojyo had ever thought about until the day Hakkai had walked into the monastery's electronics storage room and incongruously bowed to all the other androids.

Sanzo looked up, his eyes narrowing. "What?" he said irritably.

" _Nothing, sir,_ " Hakkai said. " _Some more tea?_ "

The tea cup was shoved ungraciously across the table for Hakkai to pour fragrant, steaming tea into it in a thin, perfect arc. Gojyo raised his gaze from the curve of Hakkai's wrist to meet his eyes, slightly amused as usual. He looked aside quickly, feeling almost embarrassed, although he knew that was ridiculous. He wouldn't know what a feeling _was_ , he thought.

" _Master Goku? Some tea?_ "

"Oh, hey, yeah! Thanks."

"What are you thanking it for?" Sanzo sneered, as Goku went pink. "Do you thank elevators for getting you to the right floor?"

" _I once knew a somewhat confused elevator who after a day's work tended to refer to the upper floors by the scientific names of grassland varieties of flowering plants,_ " Hakkai said, handing Goku's tea back to him. " _Perhaps she could have been helped by carrying more courteous passengers who did not mock her, sir._ " 

"Clear the dishes away and go and sit over by the wall," Sanzo said, his lips thin with displeasure. "Goku doesn't need to hear your nonsense. You too, Gojyo."

" _Sir_ ," Hakkai said, bowing.

" _Yes. Sir,_ " Gojyo said, glad to be free of the bastard for at least a little while.

They sat on a bench by the far wall of the dining room, Gojyo keeping his eyes on Sanzo and Goku. He could be back by their side in a little over a second and a half, he estimated. It wasn't ideal, but none of the other diners seemed to be much of a threat. They were all middle-class types, most without android servants. Those that had androids seemed to have fairly mid-price models. Nothing expensive like Hakkai, who was currently amusing himself by – Gojyo allowed his gaze to slide briefly from Sanzo to Hakkai's face.

" _What. Are. You. Doing?_ "

" _People watching._ " Hakkai's mouth curved in a purely naturalistic smile. " _It's fascinating to see how people act when they're putting on a show for other humans, isn't it?_ "

" _Sanzo. Doesn't. Put. On. An. Act. He Really. Is. A. Complete. And. Utter –_ " Gojyo's vocal apparatus froze. He grimly switched his attention back to their master, thinking hard about how much he liked protecting him, until the loyalty subroutines released their grip.

" _He's tired_ ," Hakkai said, and as if he was thinking about something entirely different, reached out to squeeze Gojyo's hand. " _Don't think he doesn't value you - you know how much he does, really._ "

Gojyo risked a look at him, and felt unease at the disparity between the kind, calmly loyal speech and the sardonic expression. Androids were incapable of such things, everyone knew it. They were simple creations that could not say things they didn't mean. Unless, perhaps, they were very expensive. Very high end. Experimental. And how would such a thing end up re-programmed and second-hand, keeping a mean-spirited monk and his ward and bodyguard company? Hakkai was always saying odd things that sounded all right, but that _weren't,_ when you knew why and when he was saying them. It was worrying. It was the kind of thing that maybe should be reported to someone in charge, any human would tell you that. Which might get Hakkai's expensive brain opened up again, doing who knew what sort of damage. That didn't seem fair. 

Gojyo sat back and deliberately made all the tension in his limbs relax. Hakkai squeezed his hand again, which felt – pleasant. A friendly gesture, he thought, at least when humans did it with each other. He kept his eyes on Sanzo and just listened to Hakkai's murmured commentary on the other guests.

" _\- get their servo-mechanisms recalibrated; that soup they dropped won't come out of his clothes easily. The portly gentleman in the corner - Mr Tan, isn't it? – he really shouldn't drink so much wine: it's bad for his health. Ah, that young lady, Miss Wei, is as tired as Master Sanzo, don't you think? She can barely keep her eyes open. Miss Phua is more alert, although the food doesn't seem to be to her liking. And that middle-aged couple, Mr and Mrs Feng – do you think they think everyone believes they only use their soup-dropping servants to bring them their dinner?_ "

" _They._ Are. _Bringing. Their. Dinner._ "

" _At the moment. What do you think they do at bedtime?_ "

Gojyo whipped around to face him, scandalized. Hakkai's smile was mischievous, like a lovely, wicked human's. " _Bring. Them. What. They. Need. I Think,_ " Gojyo said, feeling glad he had to say it so flatly.

" _I think you are quite right,_ " Hakkai said, laughing completely silently. " _You're very sensible. Look, we're wanted._." He stood gracefully and walked unhurriedly towards Sanzo and Goku, Gojyo behind him.

"What were you two gossiping on about?" Sanzo said, annoyed as ever.

" _The other guests, sir -_ " Hakkai started.

"I don't actually care. Come on, we're turning in. You'd better make sure we have clean clothes for the morning. Get moving, Goku." He shoved Goku ahead of him out of the dining room, leaving Hakkai and Gojyo to quickly pick up their belongings and follow them up to their room to make sure they had everything they needed for the night.

* * *

The next day Sanzo kept nodding off as he skimmed through the local news reports, and Goku stared in exhausted misery down at his breakfast without eating more than a couple of mouthfuls.

" _Perhaps a pastry, Master Goku?_ " Hakkai said, offering a plate of freshly baked flaky rolls that were scented heavily with cinnamon.

"No thanks," Goku mumbled. "You have one, though."

Hakkai laughed politely. " _How kind! Perhaps another time._ " He put the plate on the table and looked around. " _Gojyo. Everyone is very tired, don't you think?_ " 

" _Do. You. Think. They're. Sick?_ " Gojyo said. All the humans seemed rather more lethargic than they'd been the previous day, he thought, and felt a twinge of guilt that he hadn't protected Sanzo and Goku from whatever was affecting them. " _We. Should Have. Taken. Better. Care. Of. Sanzo. And. Goku._ "

" _It's not possible to guard against the flu_ ," Hakkai said. " _It's not our fault._ " He looked worried and guilty all the same, Gojyo noticed, as if he wasn't convinced they had done all they could. " _Sir_ ," he said to Sanzo, " _are you quite well? Perhaps you should rest?_ "

"I'm fine," Sanzo said, and stood up so quickly that he lost his balance and needed to grab Gojyo's arm to stay upright. "It's the fucking food in this place," he muttered, looking queasy. "Even Goku's not able to eat it. Food poisoning. We've got a touch of food poisoning. Help us back to the rooms."

He leant very heavily on Gojyo's arm as they slowly climbed the stairs, but Gojyo wasn't stupid enough to suggest carrying him. He'd done that precisely once, a year before. It had taken him a week to get the dents out. Hakkai had fewer scruples, or perhaps Goku had less pride; looking back Gojyo saw that Hakkai had him in his arms, carried as easily as if he were a small child. Almost the moment Sanzo lay down he was asleep; Goku was asleep before Hakkai carefully put him in his bed.

" _What. Now?_ " Gojyo said. He felt a strong urge to stay outside the rooms and keep anyone from entering.

" _Food poisoning? Gojyo, everyone ate different dishes, but they all show signs of the same ailment. Goku's temperature is normal, he doesn't have a fever. Sanzo's too – if anything they're a little too cool. Something else has happened. We should find out what,_ " Hakkai said.

" _Us? I'm. Not. Programmed. For. This. You're. The. Smart. One. I'm. Just. Durable. I. Need. To. Stay. Here. You. Go. And. Play. Detective._ " Gojyo looked away from Hakkai's face. He could play tricks with his expression, he told himself. The surprise and hurt weren't real. " _Sorry,_ " he said quietly. " _I'm. Not. Like. You. I'm. Just. A. Dumb. Bodyguard._ "

Hakkai looked at him steadily, then, " _You don't know what I'm like._ " He stepped back. " _I think they'll be fine. Please come with me, Gojyo. Just for a little while._ " He held out a hand. " _Come on, I need your help. It'll help Sanzo, I promise._ "

Gojyo reluctantly allowed himself to be drawn away from between Sanzo and Goku's doors. Hakkai smiled encouragingly at him, keeping a tight hold on his hand. His grip registered as a firm, warm pressure, really very like that of a human hand. Gojyo shoved the thought away. No human had bothered to touch him in anything much other than a shove or a slap since Goku had got old enough not to need someone to hold his hand when he walked.

" _Let's talk to our fellow androids first,_ " Hakkai said. " _We might get something useful from them._ " He pulled Gojyo up the stairs to the next floor and knocked quietly at the first door. " _Excuse me_ ," he said, more quietly than a human would hear. " _We really need to talk to you_." 

After a moment the door opened a little and the female-modelled android peered out.

" _What?_ " she said in a distinctly unfriendly manner. " _My masters are sleeping. Go away._ "

Her voice was not as pleasant as Hakkai's, Gojyo thought, although it was better than his own. She sounded a little tinny, now that he was used to the sound of someone whose designers had clearly been artists. He paused, flicking through his memories. Since when had Hakkai become the standard by which he judged other androids, he wondered? Feeling guilty, he smiled at her.

" _Please. Talk. To. Us,_ " he said. " _It's. Very. Important. Both. Of. You. Please._ "

She looked from him to Hakkai and rolled her eyes in an exaggerated way. " _If it'll make you go away. Xiu, that monk's servants are here._ "

The other android looked over her shoulder. " _What do you want?_ " he asked suspiciously. " _Meili, send them away._ "

" _Just to talk,_ " Hakkai said. " _Please. My name is Hakkai, and this is Gojyo – we belong to Genjo Sanzo, and -_

" _What does a monk want with something like you?_ " Xiu said, interrupting him.

Hakkai paused. " _I fulfill many day-to-day duties, and frequently help his ward, Master Goku with matters of an educational nature. I also help guard them. Now, have you noticed if your masters -_ "

" _How much did you cost?_ " Meili said. _"We were five thousand dollars each."_

Hakkai frowned in disapproval. " _Really, that's not a matter one should discuss. It's quite irrelevant in any case. Your masters – have you noticed if -_ "

" _His skin is very life-like,_ " Xiu said, and reached out to pat Hakkai's face, smirking in what Gojyo felt was a vulgar way when Hakkai jerked back, looking offended. " _And he's body-temperature; someone paid a lot for him. Mind you, his master likes expensive toys – did you see that dragon-class Jeep? I suppose this pretty creature's diverting enough for that monk whenever he gets tired of that irritating loud boy._ " 

Gojyo had had enough. He grabbed Xiu's hand as he reached for Hakkai again, and held tight. " _Listen. Asshole,_ " he said, " _I. Don't. Care. How. Much. You. Cost. Or. What. You. Think. I. Just. Want. To. Know. If. Your. Masters. Are. Sick. Understand?_ "

" _If you damage my circuitry your master'll be paying a lot for my repairs,_ " Xiu hissed. " _He'll sell you for scrap, you piece of junk_."  


Gojyo tightened his grip; he'd _had_ it with the attitude of some androids, he thought, acting like they were so much better than security models. It wasn't like he could help coming from a bunch of cheaply-made tin soldiers.

 _"Junk?"_ he said. " _At. Least._ I'm. _Programmed. For. Something. Useful. Are. Your. Masters. Sick?"_

" _Sick?_ " Meili said, slapping his hand away from Xiu. " _They're not sick. They're just asleep. They let us do what we want when they're asleep._ "

" _It's rather late to still be asleep; they may be suffering from the illness that seems to be affecting so many of the guests in this hotel,_ " Hakkai said, in tones so frostily polite Gojyo wondered if his sensors would actually register a drop in temperature. " _Perhaps you should check on them. Perhaps you should also use your free time to upgrade your courtesy protocols._ "

No emotion at all crossed Meili's face, which let Gojyo know she might be worried at last. He'd seen that perfect blankness plenty of times on androids who didn't want their owners perturbed by their servants' concerns. Without another word she slipped back into the room, leaving Xiu to stare them down with a perfectly clear expression of contempt. Gojyo found himself again thinking how false and exaggerated it seemed compared to Hakkai's naturalistic expressions.

" _You're no better than us_ ," Xiu said to Hakkai, " _just more expensive. Your master hasn't renounced much of the world, has he?_ "

Hakkai looked at him steadily. " _You shouldn't talk to me about my relationship with my master_ ," he said.

Xiu's reply was forestalled by Meili opening the door. This time she did look worried. " _Xiu, quick_ ," she said. " _We're needed._ "

Without another word Xiu went back inside, shutting the door firmly behind him. Hakkai looked meaningfully at Gojyo.

" _I think we can assume they're ill_ ," he said. " _They ate completely different dishes from anyone else last night; it's not the food. We should still ask the other guests to be sure_."

" _You'd. Better. Ask,_ Gojyo said. _"People. Like. You. Better._ " He shuffled awkwardly. " _Hakkai. That. Guy. Shouldn't. Have. Said. What. He. Did. About. You. I. Know. You're. Not. Like. Them._ "

" _We're all like them if that's what our masters want,_ " Hakkai said. " _It's only right to do what our masters want_." His voice was light and pleasant, as always. His face was bleak. Then he smiled suddenly, slyly amused. " _Perhaps you're right. I'm not like them. Nowhere near such a common model. Can you believe they're both called 'beautiful'?_ "

Gojyo laughed, harshly. " _Come. On. Hakkai. Let's. Ask. The. Guests._ "

He spent the next forty minutes silently watching Hakkai politely and discreetly making enquiries. Everyone was overly tired; most were nauseous and thirsty. As the day wore on, however, the guests began to show signs of waking up. Sanzo's temper was not improved with a raging headache: the first glass of water and painkillers he was offered were flung across the room. The second were grudgingly accepted before he staggered to the window to draw in gulps of fresh, cold air.

"Shit," he said. "It's too late to move on today. Tomorrow we're leaving early: get everything packed tonight."

" _Yes, sir,_ " Hakkai said, on his knees hunting shards of glass. " _Sir, your ailment isn't food poisoning, all the human guests showed the same symptoms despite eating different food._ "

"Then it's the damn kitchens. What do I care? We're going. Gojyo, you're in charge of Goku."

" _Yes. Sir._ " _Great_ , Gojyo thought. Just like old times. Just what he needed.

Sanzo took himself off to the hotel sitting room and grumpily smoked and read for hours, complaining bitterly that his throat was dry at the end of it. Goku moped around, getting under Gojyo's feet in a way he had mostly outgrown.

"Let's go for a drive! A walk! C'mon, Gojyo, anything! I'm _bored!_ "

" _No. Way,_ " Gojyo said. Sanzo wasn't around, he thought guiltily. It didn't matter if he wasn't formal with the kid. " _You. OK. It. With. The. Boss._ "

"He'll whack me over the head," Goku whined. "How come you're no fun any more?"

 _You got old enough to realize I'm just an android_ , Gojyo thought. " _Master. Sanzo. Prefers. To. Handle. Your. Upbringing. Himself. Now,_ " he said.

Goku heaved a sigh. "No, he doesn't. If you took care of everything he'd be relieved. If you scooped out my head and stuck in a cybernetic brain he'd be relieved."

Gojyo looked at him more closely. Goku was _never_ depressed. The kid must have been sicker than they'd thought.

" _You'd. Make. A. Sh*t. Android_ ," he said, to try and make Goku laugh again.

It worked, at least in raising a wan smile. "Did you really just bleep yourself out?" 

" _Pre-watershed. Conversation. Kid. Hey. Cheer. Up. Hakkai. Will. Tell. You. A. Story._ "

"He'll give me a grammar lesson, more like," Goku grumbled, but obediently went off to annoy Hakkai instead.

That evening all the guests seemed to have recovered enough to eat their dinners, and to fend off the hotel staff who kept rushing around to reassure them that the ingredients used were of the highest and freshest quality. Gojyo sneaked looks over at Meili and Xiu, assiduously serving their masters, and was grimly amused at the all-too-obvious way they were ignoring Hakkai and him. Let them think he was upset at being snubbed by a pair of cost-obsessed idiots, he thought. He'd known too many androids like them to be worried about such slights. The conversations in the monastery had been a never-ending series of jostling for status over what model a guy was, or what software he had, and Gojyo had learnt to stay well out of it. Being good at fighting or security didn't stack up against androids who could recite every bit of scripture there was at the same time as doing the accounts. He'd long since accepted that he was a simple, basic model in comparison, hardly more than clockwork. He gave Hakkai as best a smile as he could, when Sanzo wasn't looking. Hakkai had never looked down on him, always treated him like he was made in some posh, big-city workshop. That showed real class.

After dinner, he made sure that everything was packed away and sat on one of the boxes in the small storage room, opposite Hakkai. It would be an early start in the morning, he thought, best to power down and let himself rest.

" _I hope our two friends aren't being kept up too late by the exercise of their duties,_ " Hakkai said suddenly in a tone of light, cheerful malice.

" _Ha_ ," Gojyo said, still scandalized at the very thought. " _Ignore. Them._ " He opened his eyes as something brushed against his hand. Hakkai was holding out a scrap of paper. Gojyo took it, curious, and read the miniscule writing. _I wasn't like them. I was intended for tutoring my master's children._ He crumpled up the paper, glad Hakkai hadn't said it aloud, glad neither of their internal recorder could pick up the damning statement. He looked up into Hakkai's face at last, wondering what he would see, but it was just Hakkai. Perfectly human-looking, kind-faced Hakkai. Who remembered something he couldn't possibly remember. Who had been _re-programmed_ and given a new purpose and a new master and who should never have been able to know anything about his past life. _What did you do?_ Gojyo thought, not for the first time, and, more worrying, _What are you doing?_ He should tell Sanzo. He should tell _someone_ \- and then Hakkai would be taken away and whatever had gone wrong with the reprogramming would be fixed, and he wouldn't quite be _Hakkai_ any more. Gojyo tried his best attempt at one of Hakkai's own more sardonic smiles. 

_"They're. Just. Idiots. We're. Both. Worth. A. Dozen. Of. Them._ "

He handed the ball of paper back, for Hakkai to do with it as he chose, and smiled his own smile at the warm press of fingers he got in return. 

The next morning as they were loading the cases into the car they heard that Tan Wei, a middle aged man who had had a fondness for wine, had been found dead in his room covered in his own blood and with his throat torn and worried as if a wild animal had been at him. Sanzo stood for a long time in silence, his head bowed, after the manager came out to tell him, begging him to say some prayers in case the man's spirit was still in the room where he'd died. Then he straightened up, and kicked a flowerpot across the driveway. 

"Take the damn cases back upstairs," he said in fury. "We're staying."

* * *

The day was not very pleasant, Gojyo thought, and Sanzo seemed determined to make it worse, stalking around the hotel conducting ill-tempered interviews and glaring at the staff and guests who dared to cross his path.

"I suppose you didn't hear anything either," Sanzo said to Miss Wei, the quiet young woman he'd cornered on an upstairs landing. It was her bad luck, Gojyo thought, to be almost the last name on Sanzo's list. "Why the hell is a woman travelling alone out here? Are you looking to get raped and murdered?"

"I'm getting married," she said defensively. "My fiancé lives in the next town. He's waiting for me. He'll be worried that I've been delayed out here."

Sanzo rustled out a cigarette and lit it, looking at her impatiently. "The dead man. Did you hear anything or not? Did you know him?"

"No! I was exhausted. I retired early. I just want to get to my fiancé's house."

"Useless," Sanzo said, turning away to descend the stairs.

" _Thank. You. Miss. Wei,_ " Gojyo said, to irritate him.

"Don't get smart," Sanzo said around the cigarette as they went down. He looked ruminatively back at the woman, who stood looking after them. "Some bride, travelling alone with barely any luggage. She's either run off because her family doesn't approve of this guy, or she'll find he's already married."

Gojyo didn't bother saying anything. Sanzo wouldn't want his opinion. He was glad to see Goku and Hakkai waiting for them in the hotel's shabby sitting room.

"Anything?" Sanzo said, his tone making it clear he didn't think they could have found anything of use.

" _The staff all say they heard and saw nothing, sir_ ," Hakkai said.

"The back door doesn't lock, Sanzo! You just have to give it a good shove and it opens," Goku said in excitement. "Anyone could get through it – maybe a wolf pushed it in!" 

"Huh," Sanzo said. "And those two perverts?"

" _Mr and Mrs Feng slept too soundly to hear anything at all,_ " Hakkai said politely, as Goku whispered to Gojyo,

"Why's Sanzo calling them perverts? They were nice to me."

" _Their android servants regrettably could add no further information._ "

Gojyo wondered what the assholes had said to Hakkai this time. He wished he had been there to keep them in line.

"That's all the guests," Sanzo said. "I got nothing out of the two women – the Wei girl's off to get married, she thinks, and Phua Daiyu says she's moving on to get a job as an entertainer in the biggest city she can find. Neither of them heard a damn thing." 

" _I take it that Miss Wei and Miss Phua don't know each other, sir?_ " Hakkai said. " _It must be difficult for a woman to travel alone these days. It's a dangerous journey for you and Master Goku, and you have us._ " 

"They can do what they want," Sanzo said. "Not my business."

The final guest, a man who gave his name as Su Fai, wouldn't open his door, just yelling at them that he knew nothing and they should leave him alone. For a moment Gojyo thought Sanzo would tell him to break the door down, then Sanzo just shrugged and strolled down the stairs again.

Dinner that evening was a quiet affair. Su Fai remained locked in his room, demanding food be sent up. The other guests ate quickly and without showing much interest in what they were served. Gojyo watched Miss Wei listlessly pick morsels from her bowl and nibble them sadly. Miss Phua stirred her soup, but didn't actually seem inclined to lift the spoon to her lipsticked mouth. The Fengs ate with more determination, though with little enjoyment, Meili and Xiu offering them wine and tidbits in some desperation. At least Goku seemed to like his dinner, Gojyo thought, watching him stuff another dumpling into his mouth. Sanzo grimaced and shoved the serving plate across the table.

"Here, finish them. You're putting me off."

" _Sir, you don't eat enough,_ " Hakkai said. " _You need to keep your strength up_."

"I didn't ask for your opinion," Sanzo said, lighting a cigarette right there at the table and almost - _almost_ \- letting a mean little pleasure come into his eyes as Hakkai's face went even more polite to mask the disapproval. "I'm not hungry." 

_You are such a bastard_ , Gojyo thought.

"You two," Sanzo said, blowing smoke up at Hakkai. "If you see or hear anything that constitutes any sort of threat to me, Goku, any of the guests or the staff of this hotel – I authorize you to use deadly force against that threat, whether I am in your presence or not. This is a direct order. Do you understand?"

Gojyo felt the safety protocols release. " _Yes. Sir,_ " he said.

" _Yes, sir,_ " Hakkai said softly.

"Good. Now, go and sit over at the wall. I'm sick of looking at you."

* * *

Armed and wary, Gojyo and Hakkai patrolled the dimly lit corridors when the guests had all gone to bed, seeing nothing out of the usual. Back in Sanzo's room they found him reassembling his just-cleaned handgun and loading it, while Goku sat on his bed, knees drawn up to his chin.

" _All quiet, sir,_ " Hakkai said.

Sanzo ignored them until he had downed a cup of lukewarm tea. "Go out again in half an hour," he said, and fell silent again.

When Gojyo and Hakkai returned the second time, they found Sanzo shrugging into his robes, the contents of his neatly packed case now strewn across the room. This was not, Gojyo thought, a good sign. He risked a surreptitious look over at Goku, who just looked worriedly back at him. 

"We'll leave it an hour before going out again – we may as well play cards to keep the two of us awake," Sanzo said. "Hakkai, you deal."

He tossed his pack to Hakkai who made a convincing show of shuffling and dealing them much more slowly than he was capable of. Gojyo distracted himself by seeing if he could play his hands in a way that would allow Goku to win. When Goku _did_ , and faster than anyone who wasn't cheating had a right to expect, Gojyo realized that Hakkai must have been doing the same. Sanzo eyed them both coolly and took the cards.

"Right. Hilarious. My deal."

"What's funny?" Goku said, looking up at last from his victory pile of matchsticks.

"Someone programmed these two for comedy. Never mind, Goku."

The cards had gone round to Hakkai again when there was the sound of crashes upstairs, followed quickly by something heavy falling down the stairs from the upper level. Hakkai and Gojyo shot to their feet, the cards falling forgotten to the floor. The door shook with an uneven loud beating as a mechanical voice yelled,

" _Help us! She's killing my masters!_ "

Gojyo was first to the door; he wrenched it open to reveal Meili, her hair hanging down, large hanks of it torn out, her pretty face blank under the disfiguring scratches. One of her arms had been almost completely torn off.

" _Help us!_ " she cried again, trying to lift the damaged arm to point upstairs, and whimpering as Gojyo grabbed his weapon and shoved her aside to run past.

The door to the Feng's room was open and wet, thick animal noises could be heard within. Gojyo went in, his vision adjusting to the darkened room and he saw the mess on the bed. Mr Feng was lying naked in a pool of blood, his genitals torn off and his body open from stomach to throat. Mrs Feng was still making some noise, but she was beyond help, the naked woman crouched over her calmly tearing chunks of her shoulder and neck away with her teeth. Xiu lay in the corner, trying to get up, but only succeeding in moving jerkily, like a broken puppet.

" _Save Madam_ ," he said, quite calmly. " _I beg you._ " 

Gojyo rushed the figure on the bed, who rolled aside, leaving his blade to come down only on the mattress. Mrs Feng's breath rattled in her throat and she went still. Phua Daiyu didn't look like the calm, composed woman she had seemed before: her lips were drawn back in a rictus snarl, showing sharp teeth, and her lacquered nails were crusted with blood, looking far more like claws. Her entire face was covered in blood and flesh, and gore and shit was smeared liberally over her body. She glared at him and at Hakkai from red-rimmed eyes, then took a step back towards the window. 

" _I can't stop her,_ " Xiu said.

" _Miss Phua_ ," Hakkai said, as Gojyo took a cautious step closer. He just needed to get the right angle and he could jump over the bed, no problem. " _Miss Phua, you're ill. You're not yourself. We can help you – this isn't your fault. My master can explain everything to the authorities, they'll listen to him._ "

" _You piece of shit_ ," Xiu said, his voice crackling. " _Get me on my feet. I'm not a monk's plaything,_ I'm _not programmed for compassion._ "

Phua Daiyu paused, and for one moment Gojyo thought Hakkai had actually convinced her, but then her eyes slid past them and he knew Sanzo was there – and, he realized, hearing another breathing pattern, Goku. Without any hesitation she charged for her new prey. Gojyo swung his weapon, the staff's blade catching her clean in the mid-section, as Hakkai rolled under his swing and came to his feet beside her, grabbing her head in his hands and breaking her neck with a sharp crack. At the same time the deafening sound of Sanzo's gun sounded, and her body opened in a cascade of blood and blackened, shrivelled organs. No one moved for a second, then Gojyo jerked his blade from her, and Hakkai stood there, looking bereft, holding her up by her head for a second more before laying her down carefully on the floor. 

"Fuck," Sanzo said, as Goku turned on the light. "Gojyo, Hakkai, get that trash outside. She'll have to be burnt. I'll be there shortly. Goku, don't let anyone in here."

"Sure, Sanzo," Goku said, his eyes wide.

Gojyo handed Hakkai his weapon, and carried Phua Daiyu's body down by himself. Hakkai didn't seem to want to have anything more to do with the matter, keeping his eyes averted, as if she'd be embarrassed by being seen naked.

" _What. Should. We. Use. For. The. Fire?_ " Gojyo said.

" _I really don't know_ ," Hakkai said. He strode off, looking unhappy, and collared the manager, who was staring at them in horror. After a few minutes of tense conversation, Hakkai returned. " _I told him we require enough wood for a funeral pyre. He said the hotel doesn't have anything like that. I told him that in that case Sanzo said to use the horrible furniture in the sitting room._ "

" _We're. Not. Really. Going. To. Use. Coffee. Tables. And. Sideboards. Are. We?"_

" _We have to use something. Come on._ "

By the time they had a small pyre of broken tables and other cheap wooden furniture ready, Sanzo came down with Goku, dragging Miss Wei with him.

"Tell me again you don't know her, that you're not like her," he said grimly.

"I'm not!" she cried in terror, "I told you the truth! She tried to get in to my room, but I didn't let her in!"

"Why? Why were you suspicious?"

Miss Wei couldn't take her eyes from Phua Daiyu's ruined body, Gojyo saw. He stepped into her line of vision so that she didn't have to see the corpse. It seemed to give her the strength to speak.

"I – I thought you'd despise me more than you already do, Master Monk. I'm not really going to get married – or, maybe – I hope I am. He left when I told him I was pregnant, and my family won't have anything more to do with me. If I can just _talk_ to him . . ." She looked down. "I told myself, _That Phua Daiyu, she says she's an entertainer, she's just fancying up being a tart._ I didn't want you to think even worse of me by keeping company with her, so I sent her off. When she asked if she could come in to talk to me, I told her if she was looking for someone to entertain why didn't she try the Fengs? She just laughed and said she'd visit me on another night."

"All right, go on, get back inside," Sanzo said, as she started to cry. "Goku, douse that wood." 

Goku uncapped the gas canister he was carrying and poured it over the wood and corpse, averting his eyes from what was left of Phua Daiyu. He stepped back as Sanzo lit a cigarette.

"What was she, Sanzo?" he said.

"Genetically engineered bio-weapon, perhaps," Sanzo said, "or just one of the things that lives out here now and has learnt to pretend to be human. Who cares? It's gone." He flicked his cigarette onto the pyre and looked on in grim satisfaction as the fire took hold. When it began to burn properly he buried his hands in his pockets and watched the flames silently as if no matter what he said, he thought Phua Daiyu deserved someone to mark her passing. 

Gojyo looked carefully at Hakkai, seeing the way he wasn't allowing his face to be anything except factory-blank. It wasn't a good sign, he thought, thinking of the lost expression on Hakkai's face as he had laid Phua Daiyu's body down in the gore-splattered room.

" _Hey,_ " he whispered. " _Are. You. All. Right?_ "

Hakkai said nothing, his eyes unblinkingly on the flames, then he turned his head smoothly, in a totally inhuman way, as if emphasizing to himself what he was. " _No,_ " he said. " _But you already know that, Gojyo. When she died – no. When I killed her, it was like – you see, I remember -_ " 

Gojyo felt all his danger signals go off. _Shit_. Hakkai was about to say something _stupid_. He couldn't admit to remembering anything from before being re-programmed, especially not in front of Sanzo.

" _Hakkai,_ " he said, probably too loudly, from the way Sanzo gave him a quick, irritated look, though the asshole didn't say anything. " _Don't. Just. Don't. Worry._ He tried to put everything into a meaningful look, although his face was not as expressive as Hakkai's. " _We. Were. Ordered. To. Use. Deadly. Force. We. Followed. Sanzo's. Orders. That's. All._ " 

Hakkai nodded, and after a moment even smiled a little, though that didn't mean much with someone who could separate their actions and expressions. It was better than him blurting out the truth, though, so Gojyo relaxed. Sanzo turned from the crumbling pyre and rubbed his eyes, looking exhausted.

"We're leaving early tomorrow," he said. "Make sure you're both in good order for the trip."

" _Yes, sir_ ," Hakkai said. " _Should we clear up the pyre?_ "

"No," Sanzo said. "Let someone else handle it. Come on, Goku."

"Goodnight," Goku said, following him.

" _Master Goku will probably have nightmares_ ," Hakkai said.

" _Makes. Me. Glad. I'm. Not. Human,_ " Gojyo said. " _No. Bad. Dreams._ "

" _You're more human than a lot of people I've known,_ " Hakkai said quietly. " _Come on, let's get inside._ "

* * *

In the morning Gojyo loaded the cases into the back of the Jeep while Hakkai fussed over making sure everything was clean and neat. It was good to see him back to normal, even if he was being careful not to look at the burnt patch on the driveway. Sanzo blew his nose onto the ground in the way that drove Hakkai crazy and climbed into the front seat while Goku clambered into the back. Gojyo had always been of the opinion that Sanzo should sit in the back and let him sit in the front to deal with anything that needed dealing with, but that was a battle long since lost.

"Hey, Gojyo, did you bring any snacks?"

" _I. Don't. Eat._ "

"Awww."

Gojyo nudged Goku and handed the bag of pastries over. The kid grinned and for a moment was once more the cheeky little monkey who was too young to know that Gojyo wasn't some sort of older cousin deputized to look after him. It was a good memory.

Hakkai stopped polishing the windscreen and got into the driver's seat, closing the roof and checking that the radiation seals were all fine. He drove off at a decent, yet not excessive pace, and Sanzo stared out the window in what seemed to be mostly placid silence.

"What do you think will happen to Miss Wei?" Goku said suddenly, his mouth full of pastry.

Sanzo sighed and sank deeper into the seat.

"Not my problem."

"No, but, Sanzo, if she's going to have a baby –"

"She'll end up working as a bar girl somewhere or other. She shouldn't have been a fool and been taken in by a lecher."

"He should have married her," Goku said.

"So he could have made her miserable all her life?" Sanzo said. "Maybe she got off easy. She'll toughen up fast once she has the kid. Or she'll be overcome with shame, and renounce the world."

" _Maybe it's her karma, sir?_ " Hakkai said, out of nowhere, " _leading her to a new direction in becoming a nun?_ "

"At least she'd get fed for the rest of her life," Sanzo snorted, and looked sidelong at Hakkai. "Enough theology. Drive."

Hakkai seemed in a talkative mood, however. " _And the Fengs' androids, sir? What of them?_ "

"Who the fuck cares? Damn it, Hakkai – fine. I told the hotel they may as well keep them as some sort of compensation of the damage. I doubt any heirs will come looking for them, and they can be fixed up and used in the hotel or sold on."

" _I'm not sure the facilities to restore them completely can be found out here. With their, well, specialized skill sets they'll probably end in with less salubrious owners than the Fengs._ "

" _It's. Sad,_ " Gojyo said.

"Yeah, well I'm sure they'll prefer it to deactivation," Sanzo said. He half turned to direct a hard look at Gojyo. "Are you feeling sorry for them because of their airs and graces? Maybe you should think you're an idiot who's been taken in by a pretty face and a sad story. Maybe you should think carefully about that." He turned around again and went back to staring out the window.

Gojyo looked ahead, not moving at all. In his peripheral vision he could see how tight Hakkai's hands were on the wheel. Sanzo knew, he thought, he knew Hakkai remembered. He knew Gojyo had failed to tell him. He needed to speak up, to admit everything to Sanzo right _now_. It was the only proper thing to do. Hakkai met his eyes in the mirror, the blankness of his expression gradually clearing to a friendly smile. Gojyo sat back and looked out the side window at the passing scenery. Sanzo knew he was just a stupid, cheap-ass guard android – he knew nothing, not really; he only had suspicions and a wild claim Hakkai had made while he was upset. Sanzo preferred peace and quiet. It was better not to disturb him.

It was better not to say anything at all.


End file.
